Requirements For a Residency Visa in the UAE

[Forrest Walker]

Yesterday my wife came home with my passport. It had a full-page Visa in it. The visa has my photograph on it and a holographic stamp. It is quite impressive. AND, it is good for three years.

Now, We must proceed to the next step. We have to get the UAE national ID card called EIADs an acronym Emirites Identity Authority doodah. I look forward to having this card. Not only because it make me totally legal, and allow me to do things like get a driver’s license so I can rent a car, and a liquor license so I can buy beer, but because it is being touted by the government as the most modern identification card ever. I guess your whole life is contained on this card in electronic format, it even includes your finger prints and a a scan of your eyeball on the embedded microchip.

I can fill out the application on-line, but I have stopped because I simply cannot answer some oft the questions.

Here they are;

English First Name…ok, easy enuff

English Middle Name…do I really want to say Bozo?

English Grandfather Name…my grandfather was not English

English Famous Name…Englebert Humperdink?

English Other Names…jerk-off, layabout, I’m sure you can suggest some

English Family Name…Hmmm....Windsor?

Clan….Well, my wife is Irish of the Ash Tree Clan, but me…Well, no clan would claim me.

Tribe…I am going to say Hopi and Hopi it works.

And this is page 1 of the app. I’ll just arrive unprepared and see what happens.